Memories

Oh Jason,

I'm listening to the song you posted up right now while writing.
I see you singing to this song in the car while driving under the tunnel to New York.
I remember now!
I see your face and you're so handsome and, wow....omg, I'm getting tears in my eyes. I MISS YOU SO MUCH AND I LOVE YOU with all my heart.
See! what you are doing to me, my love for you is so strong baby.

I would kill myself if I lost you *knock on wood* . seriously.
My life would have no meaning.

hmmm

Read my previous post while you listen ok...puss

Boo!

its 9am your time, Hope you sleep well babe.

This is gonna be a very interesting turn in my life moving to sweden with you.

Wow, just 6 months ago I was waiting for my PassPort to meet you for the first time.

Now we have gone this far....this is undescribable.

From a harmless flirt to a real life passion for one another...wow.

Your family and you are great. Your mom is awsome!

Join my gang on mde to help out...read the gang page.

*Winks*

Ill talk to you sometime today...umm your voice...you can see me on cam babina.

I just imagine a warm day in the Sweden Summer on a beach at night outside our hotel...ummm...I will rock your world on that beach. I cant wait...so much to do and alot of time to do it finally...I want it all...you..our cafe...you name it.

1 step at a time...small steps...we will do it

Jason my Bobo

At the Museum.

If I knew

You were gonna be gone all night I would have gone and made labels.
You said that you weren't gonna get a hair cut...you said No when I asked.
and then you dont tell me you're going anyway.
and I asked you if you'd be home when i got home so we could talk but No...then you're already gone.

Are you mad at me for some reason?
trying to make me feel like crap?
Dont bother calling, Im tired of having to sit around waiting for you.
I got to know from your mom that you were gone getting a hair cut, she says you'll be home 4-5 pm your time, which is 10-11 pm my time.

great.
Bye.

hmm

yeah well your not online now..so ill call you

City-Therese-Labels.

Hi Baby!
Good morning.
I woke up 30 min ago, I woke up at...yeah, 2 pm.
So I got at least 6 hours of sleep. I couldnt sleep right away after we'd talk, I dont know why, it why driving me crazy cause I wanted to fall asleep so bad.
but then finaly, I fell asleep, thank god!!

I think I've gotten back in my regular sleeping moode now :)

I'm gonna go to the City now, need too. First Im gonna meet Therese and look around a little at a spring flee market at the square in the city you know, after that Im gonna go to labels and do that for a few hours, not long, dont wanna come home too late, I wanna chat and talk on the phone with you *Pusses*
And see you on cam!!!!!!! omg, cant wait to see you your gorgeous face!!
Puss puss puss puss puss puss....on your gorgeous ass!!

Call my cell if you want, Im gonna bring my phone card and Im gonna be online when Im at labels. Talk then ok!
Keep in touch!

Lots of kisses!

Negative

This blog is filled with sadness and negative feelings.
I dont like it.
Im waiting for you to write something cute, but...no...

Did you really read all my posts that I posted that hour of waiting for you last night?

.ggg

ok dont right on here..right in the blog...its ok...im here as ive always been..was just out with leaon comin back from his dads house. we went to kurts for like 1 hr..i wanted to back sooner...its ok..im here for you. I always care...im honest

Jason

Seriously. you have to call me and explain what's going on...
you have to call me...

I feel so empty right now.
So blank....
I dont know what to say anymore.
I feel so stupid for acting this way.

You have to call me, just call...my cell-phone or whatever...whenever, even if it is when Im at work.

I'm taking one step back for now. Just to make myself calm down.

God, Im crying so much!

You dont care about me!?

Talked to your mom...

She answered, she said you were out, at least that is what she thought.

Can't believe it...
You're out...doing what?
Omg.
I'm worried.
Jason! wtf!

I woke your mom up, because of trying to get a hold of you.
damn.
What a fucking mistake.
I dont ever wanna feel like this ever again...
I hate crying over you this way.

WTF!

Why are you doing this to me!!!!

Why?
I'm now getting mad at you.
Oh god. you've made me feel like crap this morning.
I'm so so so so so so so....i dont know....upset.
Thanks....thanks a lot!
I thought I could count on you.

You know...this makes me take one step back...
one step back...in caring for you too much.
Im just not care...
It's so hard. Cause I love you so much.
But Im gonna have to try and not think about you today...
Work is gonna suck...cause Im not feeling happy right now.
I've called your house 4 times now.
I feel like a fool.

I'm going to work in 30 min.
I thought Id be talking to you by now...but no.
I will never ask you for anything anymore, cause I dont wanna feel this way again...
the feeling of hope being crushed.

:(

Ive been clicking on your MDE porfil over and over and over again...
to see if you're online.

Im crying so much, looking at pictures of you, you're so goregous on them.
God...I feel like shit.
Where are you?

Why?

Why havent you called me?
Where are you?
What are you doing?

Im so disapointed.
Am I not gonna talk to you at all before I got to work?
Omg...
Shit...
...What is going on in your head right now?
"Oh, I dont need to call Jennifer or write her anything...No, no no...Ill just go to sleep."
or whatever you're doing right now....

Omg...
Feels like I care so much more then you do, you know I would do ANYTHING for you. Anything!!! and if I keept a promis I would keep it.
You havent...
And Im so sad.

My day is gonna suck!!!